Verbal and Emotional Abuse

Abuse is a phenomenon that occurs all too often and negatively affects many of us, whether we experience abuse ourselves or it is experienced by someone that we know. Unfortunately, abuse often goes undetected, which is why it can continue to occur and produce negative consequences. This can lead to what is called the cycle of abuse, in which patterns of abuse are passed on from abuser to victim, so that the victim in turn becomes an abuser and victimizes another.

While abuse commonly slips under the radar, some types of abuse may be easier to detect than others due to the nature of their manifestation. Physical abuse results in physical signs such as wounds on the body. In contrast, verbal and emotional abuse may be harder to recognize because the wounds are not physical, but psychological. Chronic bruising is likely to be caused by some sort of trauma, but moods and behavior can be more ambiguous to outside observers and even to victims themselves. Thus, psychological effects are easier to dismiss as less severe or even imaginary.

Victims of verbal and emotional abuse are made to feel by the abuser that they are worthless and guilty. The abuser often isolates them from outside support and takes control of every aspect of their life. Verbal and emotional abuse victims may be pressured to give up their personal interests or other relationships. Their thoughts and opinions are invalidated by the abuser, so they end up submitting to the abusers willthe abusers way is the only right way, and the victim feels wrong or stupid to go against it. The relationship becomes unhealthy because the victims role in the relationship is to please the abuser and to make sure not to step out of line.

Its difficult for any victim of abuse to step forward, and people suffering from verbal and emotional abuse might even prevent themselves from seeking help. They may feel as if theyre imagining that theres a problem and that nothing is really wrong. The abuser may continue to fuel these feelings of doubt and ensure repercussions for trying to leave the relationship or to talk to someone else about it. However, its important for victims to recognize that they are being abused so that they can end the cycle. The very fact that one considers the possibility that they are being abused is a sign that something is wrong, and victims should act on this instinct as soon as possible.